emotions, fresh starts, self-love

Self-Devotion is So Sexy and You Are So Worthy.

selflove“So it’s basically a self-wedding?” my client squinted, slightly antsy and anxious, trying to grasp the premise behind my upcoming “I Promise Me” Self-Devotion Ceremony.

“Yeah, I guess you could call it that.” I smiled, feeling sort of antsy and anxious, myself.

“Oh geez. Hmmm. Seriously? I don’t know about that…” She wriggled and squirmed, clearly uncomfortable with the concept. A wave of self-doubt passed through me. “What the hell am I doing?” I wondered. I have taken enough creative risks in life and work to recognize the “What the hell am I doing?” chatter as a signpost in the right direction. It usually means I’m doing something bold and new.

Isn’t it interesting that we live in a world where finding “the one” is honored and celebrated by lavish and expensive events, that the wedding industry is a billion dollar business, yet getting people together in a room to commit to the utmost devotion and faithfulness to themselves is uncomfortable for many… downright preposterous for others?

What does it mean, when someone commits to loving themselves well, when someone promises devotion and faithfulness to oneself?

Does it mean they will never make mistakes? Never act in less than loving ways toward themselves? Never have a negative thought toward themselves ever again? Does it mean that they will perfectly love and adore themselves at all times? No. Not at all.

Just as in a marriage between two individual people, there are beautiful, shining moments of clarity and perfection, romance and sweet adoration, and there are darker days, days where it feels like work, where it seems easier to give up altogether, where there is stuckness, or dryness, or exasperation. Where the lovers act more like strangers, or enemies, than lovers or best friends. Yet the commitment, the intention is there… in sickness and in health. In good times and in bad. In joy, as well as in sorrow.

Committing to yourself does not mean you will have some instant superhuman perfection bestowed upon your relationship with yourself.

It simply means that you will hold your relationship in high esteem and as an utmost priority.

That you will do your best to create a safe and loving home for your heart, that you would strive to never betray your body or your soul, that you will bravely make choices on your own behalf, even when difficult or painful.

You deserve your undying love and devotion.

You are worthy of your own affection, promise and adoration.

You deserve your own commitment.

It matters not whether you’re single, married, dating, celibate, playing the field, seeking a soul mate.

What matters is that you have a deep desire to commit to loving, respecting, and honoring yourself, and are willing to commit to this path of profound self-love, loyalty and care, for the rest of your life.

So back to the chilling question “What the hell am I doing?” I’ve given it a great deal of thought. This is what the hell I am doing:

I’m creating a space to love myself in a deeper and more devoted way. To celebrate and honor the precious relationship between me and myself.

And I’m inviting you to join me, and open yourself up to a richer, kinder and more satisfying love affair with yourself. Till death do you part.

“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.”
– Buddha


Join me in Dallas this month for “I Promise Me” Self-Devotion Ceremony and take the next step in your relationship with you.

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